Pyar Is Pyar: Surrey support group embraces South Asian LGBTQ+ community

In an effort to create a strong sense of community, a group in Surrey is supporting South Asians who identify as LGBTQ+ and who don’t feel accepted by their loved ones.

“We just try to make it as inclusive and as supportive so that people have a place to connect,” explained Puneet Kaur, committee support, Sher Vancouver.

Kau, who helps run the Pyar Is Pyar support group, says the aim is to reduce the isolation and stigma felt by those in the community.

“Pyar Is Pyar is roughly translated to like, love is love,” she said of the Punjabi name. “A lot of South Asians don’t feel comfortable coming forward and publicizing this because there’s a lot of still negative attitudes towards individuals that are queer, LGBTQ within the community. It’s because LGBTQ and the term queer is not something that you’ll see being represented in our culture.”

The Pyar Is Pyar support group helps bring the South Asian LGBTQ+ community together. (CityNews Image)

Kaur says growing up, the only accepted ideas of marriage or courting within Punjabi culture were between a man and a woman. Anything outside of that was not allowed.

“It’s a community still very traditional, very grounded in heterosexual normative relationships,” she explained. “We’re growing, we’re trying to spread awareness to a lot of South Asian communities that this is natural, it’s okay for everyone to be who they are.”

In 2008, Alex Sangha Founded Sher Vancouver to support Punjabi people who identify under the LGBTQ+ umbrella.

In 2021, Sangha created a documentary sharing the experiences of South Asian Vancouverites who felt excluded by their families because of their identity.

“No one teaches Indian parents or South-Asian parents or Sikh families about homosexuality. Where are you supposed to get your education from?” one person says in the documentary.

Sher Vancouver’s purpose is to help its members overcome social and cultural barriers.

Pyar Is Pyar meets on Sundays to talk about topics such as sexual heath and healthy relationships in a safe space. The group also hosts art days where members work on craft projects together.

“And so this is why this is important, because you get to meet other people who maybe have deviated from that cultural norm, who have chosen that this is not for me. And it’s a safe place for them to express who they are, a safe place for them to identify … because they may not be able to do that in the community. They may not be able to do that in their homes,” Kaur said.